I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
