My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
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