Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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