The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
