why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize