so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
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