they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
