well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Sext me about skeletons
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize
