then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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