I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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