I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
