yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
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