It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Dicks are not precious.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
