hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
