You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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