We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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