Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
You left your phone here
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