I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
