If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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