I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
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