I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Randomize
