That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
