Me too!
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
