Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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