how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
Randomize
