Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
