Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Randomize
