i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
We named our party play list daddy issues
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Randomize
