Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
