Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize