office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
