I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
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