what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
I think i got beer on your cat.
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