Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Randomize
