make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
we made out on top of his cat.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
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