so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Quick, to the slutcave!
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize
