My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Randomize
