I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
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