I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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