when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
