what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
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