ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
