u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize