Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
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