Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Randomize
