she looked like the bat from fern gully.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Randomize
