5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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