Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
