Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
