Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Randomize
